Childhood Dreams

What were your childhood dreams? What did you want to be when you grew up?

I think these questions or their answers stay with you all your life in some form or fashion. I've been thinking about mine recently. What were my childhood dreams?

My first memory of what I wanted to be was an Italian. I think because I liked spaghetti. Then for some reason I wanted to be a dentist. This is still a mystery. Maybe because I went to one. Those were preschool thoughts.

When I started to seriously think about it, as seriously as a child does, there was a space theme. Pretty common for someone born in the sixties ('69). I wanted to be an astronaut. I wanted to go to the moon or walk in space or anything as long as it was out of our atmosphere. Then I wanted to be an aerospace engineer. One of those guys that sat in mission control smoking Kool Cigarettes or pipes pushing buttons and speaking into headsets. I thought that might be a back way to get to space. Then I had dreams of becoming an astronomer. If I couldn't go to space, then perhaps I could stare at it every night. I'm realizing now that I had a tendency to get more and more practical for some reason.

Star Wars, Close Encounters, Raiders of the Lost Ark, and E.T. changed my life. I wanted to make movies. I wanted to be an actor. I wanted to work for Industrial Light and Magic. I needed to be a part of that. I needed to make my own magic. Those films were so wonderful. ILM was an obsession. I drew sketches of ships. I made models and masks, I studied storyboards. I loved "making of" documentaries and books. Motion control photography, go-motion animation, steadycams, blue screens, sound effects. I told myself that I wanted to act and I'd become an actor by working behind the scenes, but really I wanted to be on a crew. I wanted to pull the lens or troubleshoot an action sequence.

I finally decided that I should be a cinematographer. I'd go to film school and study Nestor Almendros or Gordon Willis or Haskell Wexler or Michael Ballhaus or even Barry Sonnefeld. But the Internet got in the way and here I am.

Here is a list of some of my childhood dreams:
1. Go into space
2. be a baseball player/hit a homerun/do something with baseball
3. Work for ILM or George Lucas/Make a special effects movie
4. Be in a band
5. Live in Europe
6. Invent something
7. Be an artist
8. Be an actor
9. Join a motorcycle gang
10. Be an astronomer

I had others. Some were more fleeting. But many are still with me. Sometimes I wonder why I can't or am not doing any of them. Are we told to forget our childhood dreams? Are we told to grow up? Is that what's expected?

I live across the street from a country firehouse. It's a training station as well. Right now I'm looking over and seeing the new recruits gathered and learning about whatever it is they learn. I wonder how many of them wanted to be a "fireman". I wonder how many of them are fulfilling their childhood dreams. I hope all of them. That would be cool.

Comments

[Rob Knight]

I remember the first time I saw The Right Stuff. I REALLY wanted to be an astronaut after seeing that movie. A few years later, I saw An Officer and Gentleman and when Richard Gere's buddy almost drowns in the pool, I got scared of astronaut training and wanted to be a radio DJ. Talk about downgrade.

I also wanted to be a baseball player. I still do. I love hitting baseballs and I always did that well. That is probably the one true talent I have. I never needed much training to hit baseballs all over the place. I still dream of baseball and Field of Dreams and The Natural always make me cry.

I think I need to do something about that second one. :)

[Shannon]

When I was a kid, I pretty much always wanted to be a baseball player. And I was actually really good at it as a kid. I eventually had to give it up in junior high to "focus on academics." I don't think I would have ever been a pro player or anything, but I always wish I had at least been able to try...

Interesting that baseball seems to be a common theme here so far. I wonder if it's still as popular these days, or if football/basketball/soccer/ultimate fighting/playstation pro are the thing these days.

Later on, I thought I wanted to be an architect - the kind that builds buildings. I still think it's a really cool profession, but I have very little pure artistic talent and could never create those beautiful detailed drawings with perfectly formed, stylized handwriting that architects so often turn out. But I really wanted to form an architecture firm with my best friend.

[Jane]

Motorcycle gang? That I didn't know. We should form one!

[Tbone]

On the back of my kindergarten class picture there's a little questionnaire, including the ubiquitous "What I Want to Be When I Grow Up". I had three things: An artist, a programmer and a daddy. Since I make my living with digital media and have two kids, I guess I made it. :)

I remember your actor/filmmaker phase well - we were doing it together. And Jane is right - we should totally form a biker gang.

[Tbone]

On the back of my kindergarten class picture there's a little questionnaire, including the ubiquitous "What I Want to Be When I Grow Up". I had three things: An artist, a programmer and a daddy. Since I make my living with digital media and have two kids, I guess I made it. :)

I remember your actor/filmmaker phase well - we were doing it together. And Jane is right - we should totally form a biker gang.

[bronco]

our childhood dreams gets killed. i wouldn't blame the Internets.